The response to Film Threat’s groundbreaking research on pairing Star Wars weed with Star Wars movies was immense. Unfortunately, I was too high to comprehend most of it. I was surprised to receive emails written in crayon. Some questioned the deeper philosophical aspects of Star Wars, such as why C3PO and R2D2 Underoos were only available for girls. However, two messages stood out: people wanted more Star Wars weed strains and more Star Wars movies. Thus, we returned to Film Threat’s Auxiliary Research Lab in Arizona to test which strains of marijuana would enhance the ancillary entries of the Lucas Mythos. The result? A Sativa-fueled journey to Spin-off City. So light up a spliff the size of Walrus Man’s arm, as we enter hyperspace inside your mind.
Pair Jedi Kush with Rogue One: A Star Wars Story to keep your nerves calm while navigating the Death Star’s fatal weakness. This hybrid strain will clear your head and keep you focused, making it perfect for space trucking with the rebels. But beware, if you smoke enough, you may end up being saber cut into ribbons by Vader.
Wookie Pebbles is the ideal strain to pair with Caravan of Courage: An Ewok Adventure. This 1984 TV movie was beloved by children caught in the Ewok honeytrap of Episode VI. Wookie Pebbles will reduce your discomfort while allowing you to appreciate the teddy bear parade and the kids in the lead roles.
Ewok pairs best with Ewoks: The Battle for Endor, a 1985 TV movie sequel that injects fantasy into the science fiction foundation. This is due to the involvement of the Wheat brothers, who wrote and directed this film. Ewok marijuana will turn your body into a shiny helium balloon to float over the endless forests of teddy bear town.
Chewbacca pairs best with The Star Wars Holiday Special, a 1978 holiday special that is infamous for its bizarre content. Chewbacca weed will flood your senses with a peppery inferno of fun, allowing you to appreciate the weirdness of Itchy watching VR disco porn and the debut of Boba Fett.
Finally, Dog S**t pairs best with Solo: A Star Wars Story, a film that was underwhelming despite Ron Howard’s direction. This high-powered hybrid strain is named after the specific odor of the flower and will make the film almost bearable. While watching, you may realize the movie is garbage, but you’ll be too zapped to care.